If I were a Cat, I would never need to take a Holiday…

cat holiday

It’s Sunday, the designated day of rest… And after an intense period of work and tiredness and a low constant level of illness, I finally feel like I’m actually slowing down… I’ve taken some time out, to catch up with myself, and to recharge my energy… And some how, to use another Sunday para-phrase, I feel, finally, like I could now embrace a whole month of such delicious days…

When I observe my cats at rest and at play, it seems as if every day is a Sunday to them – as they eat and rest and live to their own tempo, bending time to their will, putting in effort only as a nice necessity, to expend energy, to expand their horizons, radiating out, from the safe warm cave of their home, to explore and twitch through their territory, to do their business (yes – in every way) and thence to return home, simply to start the cycle over and once again.

I work to a different beat and often that beat is metronomic – a ceaseless beating back and forth to the loud tick of time and tides and deadlines and other’s urgencies.

Unlike me, the cats saunter, sniff and sense their way through their days, testing and tasting; whereas the world I walk / run / drive through, can if I let it, be lost to other people’s mores. But in our outside days, we can both encounter obstacles – literal for them, figurative for me – tracks to tread carefully; dogs to avoid or to challenge; establishing our position in the global pack; cars trying to run us down… And so on and etcetera…

The thing is, that I like to be out there in the world – to play my part, to flex my brain, to dance to the tempo of the working world and then, I find, more and more that for my own balance and sense of id, that I need to find my own way too – to balance these routines with rest, to create and to stretch, to work in my purest zones of genius, giving my best gifts of leadership, support and creativity.

And how to balance all these things into a happy harmony – how to have a life of melody, rather than cacophony..?

To finally get to this Sunday state of rest and relaxation, I had to stop the world and get off… I had to leave my routines and the cave – my home and sanctuary. I even have to leave the cats behind for a while – though they are taken well care of, of course…

I’m having a holiday, a break from routine reality, and who know that doing this would make me sick, in both body and soul…

I’ve had a long intense period of activity with work and with many other aspects of my life all speeding up and colliding, and so slowing suddenly down didn’t seem natural (I now realise in hindsight)… I had decided to take a break, to spend more time in the cave, and then manically started to fill that ‘down time’ with new activities. Instead of peace and space, new deadlines started to fill my diary up… I had to take some drastic action and get away…

So off I went, stressing and huffing to break the ties of an unliberated life, and arrived at my designated destination ready to sink into a torpor of blissful relaxation…

Instead I found my head full of poisonous thoughts; I found my body manifesting all manner of sick symptoms – headaches, soreness, tenseness and indigestion… Humph! Some holiday…

So I realise that these demonic happenings had been there all along, inherent in my psyche and body, I just hadn’t given myself any time to notice them, to acknowledge them, and so to heal them and deal with them as I trooped along…

Now I have had the time to deal with my demons, and out they all fly, shooting out of my subconscious, to stomp tracks through my brain and to squeeze my heart into a hard tiny box… Some bloody holiday, this…

So I tried to change tack and track – avoiding my demonic thoughts and feelings with reading and napping and eating. But, being demons, they refused to budge or be re-routed, and instead stood in front of me, nose to nose, breathing their hot, hating bad breath into my face, down my neck and trickling their darkness, slickly and sickly, into my heart…

I’m tired, I feel that I have little strength to ward off such evil, but yet I know, that I have knowledge and I have will and so I actually faced up to them, and faced them gently head on… All this mental effort – some sodding holiday!

Still, I didn’t push back hard against my demons, I lent into them and listened intently, instead…

And then the answers start to come… I can feel that I have menopausal hormones fizzing through my veins – and my demons love to ride on them, shamelessly, bare backed… I need to monitor this more, take care of my body and traverse this transition in my life with less loathing and more good grace…

I have pushed my self and pinched myself into work, giving myself willingly to it, letting it both enervate and punish me – I need a healthier more structured routine to support all I do – to watch my nutrition, faithfully follow through and do my daily meditation, and to stretch and exercise my body.  My home has turned into a maelstrom of mess and disarray. I could sort it all out, but how long will that take me, and when will the will power run out? It seems that I must ask for help, to throw away, to sort and re-structure…

This is supposed to be a holiday, but there I am, making phone calls and arrangements, and planning for a fast future again…

And now I’ve faced those demons, soothed them and dealt with them. I’ve given myself the time and space to lay it all out, and suddenly it all seems so… simple… And the demons suddenly have turned from solid to ghostly form, and have floated upwards and away from me… And now I’m content and at peace, and finally ready to really relax into my holiday… Of course, the thing is that this vacation has now ended and I have to return to my restless reality. Call that a holiday???

Have I got my life all wrong? That I learn, then get caught up in a lesser life and forget my education – my schooling in a different way of living..? And is it so wrong that I constantly catch my self being ‘human’, and complaining and crying.

Well, I am human, and I am still trying to break the habits of a life time. I still don’t do this ‘life led differently’ scenario, naturally… But then that too is my strength, I don’t preach my wisdom, I try it and test it; and then share the scares and my lessons learnt, and so it becomes my triumph. Then I see how others have such experiences too, and how I can show a way that works for us and brings us all to a place of knowledge and of peace.

So holiday over, it’s time back to go back my ‘real’ life and to return to my cats… In fact it’s time to think more ‘cat’ – they have this ‘knowledge and peace’ piece neatly licked, just as those rough rasping tongues of theirs untangle and clean their fur so  efficiently and constantly. Cats know how to rest and how to play, and when a creatures has such cinched certainty, they, clever creatures that they are, don’t need a holiday…

Well… I’m not a cat, so somehow what I’ve just been through feels like a ‘pre-holiday’ – a physical and mental exploration to prepare me for what ever is going to happen next in my life. And I’m planning my next holiday of course… Demon free this time… Whilst the cats will inevitably, bide their time in the Pride…

PS: Did you know that a collection of my ‘Peachey Letters’ have been gathered together in to a beautiful book, cats and all?  I’m completely biased of course, but it makes a purrfect present, for you or the cat lover in your life… You can buy it from book websites any where in the world, including Amazon (in both Paperback and Kindle)

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